RSS

Tag Archives: arguments

BLESSED ARE THE MERCIFUL (Mt 5:7) – HOW MERCIFUL DO WE NEED TO BE?

Blessed are the merciful

“You probably would feel quite offended if someone were to describe you as a cruel person. Yet, can you truthfully say that you never have caused unnecessary pain to another? You never have harshly criticised another, humiliated another or made cutting remarks to another? If you can answer, ‘Never’ (or even ‘Seldom’) to all such questions, then you are indeed close to the heart of Christ. ‘Blessed are the merciful,’ He has said, ‘for they shall obtain mercy.’

Vigilance, lest power corrupt in us the spirit of mercy

Few of us are so accomplished in this matter of mercy that we can afford to assume that we are included in our Lord’s blessing. Those of us who are in any position of authority, such as employers, supervisors, officials, teachers and religious superiors, have particular need to be vigilant lest power corrupt in us the spirit of mercy. It is so easy to be caustic towards those who cannot strike back.

Having others ‘at our mercy’

Failure in mercy is not confined, of course, to persons explicitly in positions of authority. There are many ways of having others ‘at our mercy’. We have the upper hand, for example, any time we enter a store or a restaurant. Since the customer is always right, clerks, waiters and managers must bear with our discourtesies in silent helplessness.

Often we inflict the deepest pain upon those we love

Often we inflict the deepest pain upon those who are bound to us by love. A husband snarls at his wife or a wife screams at her husband. Sometimes parents excoriate their children out of all proportion, making a capital offence of what is, at worst, a minor misdemeanor.

Venting our anger on the next best person

More often than not, the reason why we are grumpy or snappish toward another is because we have bottled-up feelings of resentment or frustration which press for ventilation. A teacher who has just been reprimanded by his principal, for example, will land like a charge of dynamite on the first pupil who steps out of line in the least degree. Nine-tenths of our temper explosions really do not belong at all to the hapless person who is rocked by our anger. Our victim simply happens to be the nearest and most defenceless object upon whom we can discharge our emotional pressure.

Reacting savagely to minor annoyances

Sometimes it is nervous fatigue or physical distress (such as a headache) which causes us to react savagely to minor annoyances. Like a sick animal, we growl and bare our teeth at anyone, however innocent, who happens to cross our path.

A gentleman never gives pain

Cardinal Newman has described a gentleman as one who never gives pain. A gentleman bears his own inner hurts and tensions with fortitude and does not visit them upon others. It is an infallible sign of a small mind and a weak character when a person is discourteous toward those over whom he has some advantage.

There are times, of course, when a person in authority must administer an admonition or a rebuke. Yet, even this can be done with gentleness and tact. It is so much better to say, ‘You are doing a fine job, George, but there is one small thing which I feel I should call to your attention,’ than to shout, ‘You stupid fool! See what you’ve done!’…

Our Lord Jesus singled out the virtue of mercifulness for special attention

‘Blessed are the merciful, for they shall obtain mercy.’ It is no wonder that Jesus singled out the virtue of mercifulness for such special attention. This is the one virtue above all others which characterises Himself. His patience, His allowance for human weakness, His compassion, His quickness to forgive – all combine to give us confidence as we pray to Him, ‘Lord, have mercy!’

The people whose lives touch ours have enough suffering already. It is inexcusable if we add to their hurt by our discourtesy, ill-temper and vindictiveness. If we cannot be gentle, patient and forgiving toward one another, then Jesus has a right to ask, ‘What price My crucifixion? Was it, then, all in vain?'”

– Fr Leo J. Trese, One Step Enough

 
Leave a comment

Posted by on August 3, 2015 in Words of Wisdom

 

Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

INNER SILENCE AND OUTWARD PEACE

In peace let us pray:

R. You are a helper close at hand in time of distress.

From outward turmoil and inner disturbance:
– deliver us, O Lord. (R.)

From quarrelling in our homes and war among the nations:
– deliver us, O Lord. (R.)

From the bustle which keeps us from prayer in this busy season:
– deliver us, O Lord. (R.)

(Personal intentions)

Our Father…

O God of peace, you sent St John of the Cross to teach the way to inner silence and outward peace. Through his intercession, renew in your Church a deep spirit of prayer as we prepare to welcome your Word, who lives and reigns with you and the Holy Spirit, one God for ever and ever. Amen.

 
 

Tags: , , , , ,

ADVICE, PLEASE – “NOW THAT ALL OUR CHILDREN LEFT HOME, MY WIFE AND I SEEM TO BE ARGUING MORE”

“QUESTION:

Now that our youngest has left home, my wife and I seem to be arguing more. It is nothing serious but we are struggling to find ways to improve our relationship.

ANSWER:

As in our relationship with God, marriages often go through different stages which present new challenges. For many years the care of your children has been a major focus in your lives. That care is a great and blessed work for which you can rejoice in the Lord.

There are no perfect parents (and no perfect children), but alongside the humble recognition of your weakness, you can rightly be joyful at a task carried out with integrity. Your children will still need your support and encouragement – and, please God, before too long your love for them will be rewarded with the blessing of grandchildren.

Now, being thrown back on each other, so to speak, you find that you have each changed through your experiences and there is a new task of living in Christian love without the daily care of others in the home. Our weakness and tendency to sin means that the cross is at the heart of every relationship. We wound each other by greed and selfishness, even if only in small ways, and we need to overcome this primarily by charity.

In worldly terms, people speak of gratuitous acts of kindness which make the world a better place. As Christians, we can speak of supernatural acts of charity: those small deeds, to which we are not obliged, carried out with the motive of the love of God. Such deliberate acts of charity bring peace and tranquillity. The spiritual and healing power of such Christian charity is immense, both in its positive enhancement of a relationship and in its protection against evil.

If you are looking for some sound support, the programmes of Marriage Encounter and Retrouvaille have helped many couples. In a nutshell, Marriage Encounter is for couples with good marriages who want to make them even better, whereas Retrouvaille is for couples who have problems and need marriage help. You could look at both and consider which might be the most appropriate.”
– This article by Fr Tim Finigan was published as part of the feature “Catholic Dilemmas” in “The Catholic Herald” issue November 22 2013. For subscriptions please visit http://www.catholicherald.co.uk (external link).

 
 

Tags: , , , , , , ,

“MAKE MY FAMILY WORTHY OF YOUR PEACE”

O Jesus, thank You for thinking about our families too. Please, right now, with all Your heart, make my family worthy of Your peace.

Cleanse it from every stain of sin so that Your peace may flourish and grow in us. May Your peace drive away all anguish and conflict in our family.

Make us be totally enveloped by Your peace and, as the One who brings peace, be the special guest in our home. For our neighbouring families we ask that they may also be replete with Your peace, and, in this way, let joy be lived by all. Amen.

 

Tags: , , , , , , , , , ,

PRAYER IN FAMILY DIFFICULTIES

PRAYER TO ST MARTIN DE PORRES FOR PEACE IN THE FAMILY

We turn to you, St Martin, for help in our present difficulties. You were always a lover of the Prince of Peace and the builder of Peace. We recall how you spared no effort to preserve harmony in your sister’s family and among your Dominican brothers. Obtain for us that we may help one another and be ever ready to forgive as we hope to be forgiven.

Ask God to give us the wisdom and generosity to make allowances for others. Help us never to say or do anything that would injure the peace of our family but do all we can to create and preserve an atmosphere of trust and reverence and love. We ask you to present our intentions to Christ our Lord. Amen.

 
 

Tags: , , , , , ,